Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Why Can't They Understand? (March 8th,2011)

Today was like any other day. I got up, went to school, and did my work. I saw my friends. And i thought everything was gonna be good but that was until i got my math test today. We went over it in the beginning of class and i thought i would get  a good grade on it. I still hope i did. There were some problems on there that still troubles me and its frustrating how the teachers think you know everything in a quick second. Of course when i got home, i explained what happen today with my mom and she said everybody learns at different speeds but ill explain that a little more later.

Okay so, i was taking my test right? And i thought that the first few problems on the front were pretty easy but then when i got to the back, i completely froze at the last few questions at the bottom. I was completely lost and just staring out at space. Now, i was gonna continue to finish it in my 4th period with the help of my teacher and i did but when the lunch bell rung, my co-math teacher came up to me and started jumping at me at how i was just staring off in space and doing nothing. I told him i wanted to finish it later and to get help and he told me that just this once, he'll let me finish it in 4th period but then he started asking all these crazy questions like: "What don't you get?" Or, "Have you been asking everybody else in the class?" I told him that i DO ask for help and i DO ask my primary teacher but then he was all like: "You ask everybody else but not me." And that kinda pissed me off cause i was thinking like: "Are you jealous that i ask everybody else and not you? Maybe i WANT to ask other people and not you." Though, i thought about it of course.

So, anyways, i was nearly into tears because he was jumping on me like some sleazy piece of meat and i left that class for lunch in tears. My primary teacher saw me crying and told me to calm down and stuff and enjoy lunch and so i did, partly. I burst into another set of tears infront of my friends and my math buddy conforted me of course. After lunch, i stayed with my friend outside by our class door so i can cool off. It was pretty embaressing to me to be crying like a baby infront of everybody but i was so frustrated that i couldnt take it anymore.

Right now, im totally pissed at the whole situation. While everybody else is trying to help me and bring my grade up, my co-math teacher is trying to help me AND trying to bring my self esteem and confindence down. I REALLY hate him. He said that i do NOTHING in class which isnt true. I ask for help. I do my work. But, NO he HAS to act like a completely asshole and bring my confindence down. I really wanted to die right at that moment. I don't know how i can survive for the rest of the school year.

Luckily, i got help of course and was able to finish my test in 4th period but the bad part is that i didnt get the chance to even continue to finish my biology homework thats due tomorrow. Oh well.

When i got home, i explained to mom what happen of course and like i said before, kids learn at different speeds so my teachers shouldnt assume that i know everything just like that and it is frustrating. She keeps saying i have a meeting this week and i can't wait to hear what my math teachers say. It makes me wanna cuss out my co-math teacher for him bringing me down while everybody else is trying to help. I also dont want tutoring because it NEVER helps. I went to tutoring after school before and it never worked. It had too many people in it of course and they couldn't get to me that well so i HOPE i dont have it. Remember what i said before that im glad that my mom is here to help me? Well, im REALLY glad she is. Everybody else doesnt seem to understand or always tries to bring me down when im already a sad person at heart and mind. Lets see how tomorrow goes....

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